Tuesday, March 4, 2008

We ain't here for any Monkey Business, or are we??

This is quite a moment I must say - one of the rarest occasions when I am left with too many things to write , too many people to speak about , and too many technicalities to explain. But still , this is our moment and let's savour every second of it. The ever elusive Commonwealth Bank/Victoria Bitter series has been won by India.
(Yes, this is not the Under-19 team which has won it - that is another long story altogether. Its the seniors team this time around ;) )
We remember seeing the familiar look on M.S.Dhoni's face at the conclusion of the T20 Worldcup last year in Southafrica - when we saw what he did today after India had won it all fair and square against Australia. Maybe a lucky look ? Who knows - either ways he is playing for our city in the IPL and its good if he has a bit of luck too!
And so, ladies and gentlemen, the much-talked about Australian summer has finally ended , and to India's credit - on an upbeat note. Let us travel back and analyse what we have learnt out of this gruelling three-month long slugfest.

1. Big-talking is fun. *
*if you aren't playing the next match.
*if you are playing the next match.
*if you have long hair plaited in a little bundle up there.
*if you are balding.(Haydos and Punter beware ;) )
*if you are not someone called "The Master Blaster"
*if you don't have any other job in the team to do.

2. Itching/scratching/touching yourself in the wrong places on the ground is forbidden. *
* Conditions apply to excessively under-dressed-populated Australian cricket grounds.

3. Streakers are a lucky sign for India. Everytime one appears we win. So then why were they two in the second final at Brisbane ? Sources tell there aren't enough nudist beaches in Brisbane's vicinity.

4. Want a free ticket back home + become a national hero + make the whole world talk about you ? Give a wrong decision + treat all appeals with equal racism.

5. Want to stay back on the tour ? Be under 22 years of age.*
*preferably belonging to Mumbai ,Delhi and having spiky/long hair.

6. How to go into a form slump ? Be paired with Deepika Padukone ( plus trade in your mom and dad to speak about the both of you on Headlines Today)

7. How to retrieve yourself from a form slump ? Look at the lady officers when the oh-so-masculine streakers emerge.***

***P.S - Any idea if Cricket Australia are recruiting female streakers to spread the game?

8. How do you make your wicket look very costly ? Let loose "obnoxious" comments on local radio. *
* ensure it gets across to the Indian Mafia(or Media??)

9. How do you screw up yourself ? Not let a veteran retire in peace and victory - keep him out of the team.


10. How do you win against the Mighty Australians?

Let an in-form Sachin invent "Khatam Karo Ghar Chalo".

I think the last four words explain it all.

1 comment:

Ruud said...

ha ha :) nice :) act in a film wen in a form slump ;) for Yuvi..he s gonna act in one directed by his dad..his first n last film ;)