Thursday, September 18, 2008

Wrenching the soul out..

Not so recently (but definitely relevant), I attended a special screening of Rang De Basanti - on Independence day. As the movie rolled on , there were invisible fangs poking into my skin- that feeling of your guts at rock bottom ( the feeling when you go up in a lift? ) and a lot lot more. Every moment of the movie brought back memories of people who had been there when I watched the movie first-up at Ega theatre in Chennai- but now, aren't there to see what and where I am. Little tears rolled down my cheeks and I could not hold back from being little emotionally overcharged( thankfully some death scene was going on in the movie too - I escaped notice by others) Subconsciously, my mind was pressing onto me the fact that I may have committed some sin in my previous janma- or life as they say it in Hindu Vedas. The yearning human mind searches for a multitude of reasons about what may have been the "kartha" or doer of this deed- in the end it ends up with too many things negatively pointed towards yourself. Inevitable I say- for the person that I'm- I keep telling myself something went wrong with me.

Perhaps I did commit some sin? Who knows- but I very well know that what is gone is gone and irretrievable., death of a person (be it in the body and soul) is all but the same- the latter I would say is more excruciating infact. I know many will concur with me on this. Its just the irony of life.

You know the value of someone only when they're gone and will never, ever, be with you again.

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